Projection: When we have to give a suggestion/advise to someone we tend to share a lot of points of knowledge in order to make them understand. We try to prove logically why they have to change. Although the reasoning is right most of the time, the others don't seem to change either because they don't understand or because they don't want to understand.
Solution: When we want to bring transformation in others we need to make sure to share our own virtues along with the points of knowledge. To share virtues means to give them an experience of our love, peace, good wishes etc. When they experience our virtues, they'll be willing to bring about change quickly.
Overcoming Frustration In Relationships
There are two things in life that we can never change:
• the past and
• other people
This often brings us one frustration after the other, especially when we do not get the results that we want. Frustration is also a sign of failure, and every time that you fail in getting what you want from the other, your self-esteem and self-confidence are reduced.
Frustration is a form of anger. You allow the negative emotion to control you, and therefore you lose control. Most times situations will not be as you want them to be and neither will people behave as you want them to. Therefore, you can decide now if you want to continue allowing the other to dictate your reactions according to how they behave, which results in the loss of your rule, control and personal power, or you can decide that no matter how the other behaves, you rule over your responses; you decide what you want to think and feel.
When another tries to control you and then gets frustrated because you don't do what he or she wants or you aren't who he or she expects you to be, they get in a bad mood with you; they look at you with anger and what do you do? You then place an invisible barrier between you and him or her. In such a way that they cannot 'enter' into your world and you do not leave yours either, they lose their influence over you. In the same way, when you try to control people you lose your influence over them and distance is generated.
In Spiritual Service,
Brahma Kumaris
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